sPin ME 'RoUnD agAiN anD rUB mY eYEs tHiS caN'T be HaPpENinG

So here i am again. It's been quite a while, i hope that everything is going well for most of you. And might i say that this is the new year and what a happy one it has been thus far. 2007, it's been a lot better of a year that last year. I started my new year at Brenton's house. I had a really good time, the people there were exceptional, and i do so love the melodies of the guitar. I got a call from brandon that kinda pissed me off, but i'm over it now, and i seemed to get mostly over it then. I haven't talked to him much lately, of course, i have also been busier than hell. Everytime we are going to get together and chat it up, he forgets to mention plans with Titzar or something else, like he falls asleep or is in too much pain from his MS to do anything. I am tired of him bitching to everyone else that he has no one to hang out with and making it seem like it's all my fault.
This of course was a while ago and by this time, i am fairly over it.
What of now,what of now... Nothing really much. Life is still life, and i am in love with everything that is going on. Yet, there are still times when it seems like life is coming on all too quickly and i don't know how i am going to deal with it all. It's confusing and upsetting and i just don't know how much longer i can stand the thought. I never thought the end would come so quickly and that when i least expected it, i would lose everything that i had built up in the world.
In this last year i feel like i have lost everything that i wanted. A family that i loved comprised of friends who took care of me. That was lost in a moment and then in many moments that followed. And now my entire high school family. People i love and people i continue to find all the time that i will just not see the way i see them now, everyday.